Auction marred by ‘unfit conduct’


Player list

Glass empty: moral bankruptcy marred proceedings

AN ETHICS committee is to be formed at Kenna HQ after last night’s controversial Olisadebe auction.

Two incidents of note relating to the Titus Bramble Ruling, where a manager forfeits an illegal player, caused heated confrontation, with the Horn of Africa manger threatening to resign halfway through proceedings.

Later in the evening, the FC Testiculadewland boss was found to be engaged in ‘tactical Brambling’ – knowingly attempting to buy an illegal player to free up funds from the one he would forfeit.

Despite working for on the case for almost 24 hours, Scotland Yard are still scratching their heads as to just where the spirit of Kenna has disappeared.

“Two incidents of note at the auction betrayed some truly unfit conduct from managers. The Kenna has always been a place of genteel manners and this type of histrionic or devious behaviour will  not be tolerated,” said the Chairman in an official league statement.

“We will form a Kenna Ethics Committee to establish a managers’ code of conduct. We’re also looking to develop a ‘fit and proper persons test’, although looking around the table last night we shouldn’t make it too difficult,” continued the Chairman, who definitely didn’t fall asleep on the bus home and wake up in Enfield.

Full teams will be published soon.

Bunch of twits

Fag and handjob tweet

Top tweet: Despite almost walking out over it, The Horn of Africa loses Robben on a Bramble

Broadcasting the auction live on Twitter, the Kenna gained a grand total of two new followers.

“Controversy aside, we think the rest of the auction went rather well,” said the Chairman.

“Although interaction with the online community was limited, the tweets do provide an excellent chronicle of the evening.”

Live broadcasting the summer auction is to be decided pending review.

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